1. What were some of the statements in which you both rated yourself excellent or very good (4’s and 5’s)? Specifically, what is it about your strengths as a communicator that might explain these scores?
2. What were some of the statements where you both rated satisfactory, poor, or very poor (3’s, 2’s, or 1’s)? What is it about your “weaker areas” as a communicator that might explain these scores?
3. Why do you believe there was there some disagreement with your scoring? E.g. when you rated yourself high, but were rated lower by your partner; or, when you rated yourself low, but were rated higher by your
4. Based upon this feedback, what two listening skills could you improve? Specifically, what behaviors would your partner observe with these improvements?
5. What do you think is the single most important communication skill?
Why is this skill so significant?
Think about a situation that has concerned you, one in which an assertive response would be helpful. Write what you would say and to whom you would say it using the DESC model.
Finally, write a positive word or short phrase reminding you of your
ability to act assertively in future
I want to be explain to you what is The DESC Model,
The Desc model has four parts :
1-Describe : paint a verbal picture of the situation or other persons
behavior that is a source of stress . be as precise as possible .
2- Express : express your feelings about the incident using “/” language
. Using “I” statements allows you to take responsibility for your
behavior and your feelings.
3- Specify : be specific in identifying several ways you would like the
other persons behavior or the situation to change. rather than saying ”
you should,” use “I would prefer , i would like
4- Consequence : identify the consequences that will follow if the
person does or does comply with your wishes . for example : ” If you do
, I will ,…
Mary has just walked out of a meeting with her sorority sisters when the
president of the sorority walks up and announces in a voice , ” mary ,
you did such a good job chairing last year homecoming float committee. i
d like you to do it again this year . ” mary really does not want the
job again . It look a lot of time and required a tremendous amount
amount of work . Feeling trapped, however ,mary says, “sure,Erica,I’d
like be glad to do it .”As she walks away ,Mary’s stomach is churning
and she angry with both Erica for putting her on the spot and herself
for agreeing to something she doesn’t want to do .
DESC MODEL ====>
Describe : Erica,when you come up to me in front of several sisters and ask me to do something.
Express : I feel trapped , angry and taken advantage of .
Specify : I’d prefer that you either bring this up at our meeting or speak to me about it personally .
Consequence : In the future if you do this again , I won’t volunteer and it will hurt our friendship.
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